Sunday, 27 April 2008

Mace Windu versus Samuel Pepys (Jedi Knight)

My seven year old daughter recently informed me of a startling similarity between Mace Windu (famous for his diary on a galaxy far far away) and Samuel Pepys (famous for starting the great fire of London by accidentally igniting a bale of straw with his light sabre); they were both bald.
Mace Windu and Samuel PepysI think you'll agree - the resemblance is uncanny.

Wednesday, 23 April 2008

Easy fixes

So I asked my daughter "What's your favourite film? ... Is it 'High School Musical'?" - I remembered seeing her once (or more) watching it before trying to back out of the living room unnoticed. "Is it 'Grease'?" – I knew that dancing was a key factor. She pursed her lips and then raised her hand to me as if to say "Back off, I'm thinking". After some careful deliberation she replied "I don't know Daddy. What's your favourite film?"

Un Coeur En Hiver
Considering she's only six I gave this far too much thought, and there are dozens to choose from, but I eventually told her "You know, I think it might be Un coeur en hiver"

"What does that mean?"

"A Heart in Winter" I said. "It's a French film".

"Can I watch it?"

"I'm not sure you'd like it."

"I would…" she said. "What's it about?"

"A beautiful violinist who falls in love with a violin maker, but he is unable to love her in return."

"Why not?"

"His heart isn't working properly."

"Why doesn't he see a doctor?"

"Good question…" I said, "I suppose some things aren't all that easy to fix."

Monday, 31 March 2008

Green is the colour

Carbon offsetting cartoon
What is the purpose of green taxation? I’m not arguing the importance of preserving the environment; I’ll take that as read. What I’d like to know is how a green tax helps in this respect? This sounds like a pointless question until you look at those taxes implemented to date and ask whether they’ve done anything to improve the situation.

Has the energy tax on power generating companies changed people’s habits?

Has a huge level of tax on petrol stopped people from using their cars?

Will a tax on air travel stop people from taking holidays abroad and is it fair?

The problem with many environmental taxes is two-fold. The first is that unless there is a way to avoid paying the charge whilst still obtaining the goal, they don’t actually achieve anything. I need energy to keep me warm in winter; an energy tax only hurts the poor and elderly. I travel to work by car every day not because I want to, but because there’s no viable alternative. Whilst an air tax might feasibly make travel abroad too expensive for some, in reality all that’s been achieved is to make such holidays elitist; leaving them firmly in the grasp of the middle classes who will appease their guilt over the next skiing trip by buying into some carbon-offsetting nonsense.

The second problem with environmental taxes is psychological; a lot of people seem to like paying them. It’s the equivalent of confessional time at the Church, you pay your tax and all is forgiven. It may make us feel better but it doesn’t actually do the environment any good. It hasn’t stopped me from driving to work, because I have to drive to work; I haven’t been provided with a choice.

Whilst the government may applaud people’s willingness to be fleeced of their money, this kind of taxation is dangerous as it encourages the public to continue with their non-ecological lifestyles, it might even make some feel better in the mistaken belief that their money is being put to good use. Green taxes have resulted in many environmental groups taking their eye off the ball and consequently the pressure off the authorities.

The real issue, as it always has been, is the requirement for integrated policy from central government. But an integrated transport policy, for example, would require a consistency of thought that doesn’t give itself easily to sound-bites and, judging from the mad re-positioning of the main political parties, doesn’t win votes. The real problem, as it always has been, is us.

Friday, 8 February 2008

It all came toppling down

Jenga
Many years ago, more than I care to remember, when I still believed in 'that kind of thing', Mrs R commented on how commercial Valentines Day had become. I distinctly remember her saying that buying flowers was such a waste of money considering how long they lasted.

Result, I thought. Somehow, purely by accident, I had a partner who would be able to recognise the real essentials of life; such as a flat screen television, multi-media PC and a subscription to the sports channels.

In my defence I did recognise my mistake, though it came far too late. In the spirit of originality, or perhaps desperation, I bought her Jenga. Whoops...

Wednesday, 6 February 2008

Blind faith

A blinding light
To colour my hope
With a faith that might
Fulfil me

Preceded by grey
Of all the days
You reeled me in
Abused me

Was I an easy mark
Like my trusting mother
Am I just another

The angels lark

I am your misplaced sentiment
A romantic fool
A tool
For your amusement

Sunday, 27 January 2008

Reality 3 – 0 Romance

Liverpool FC badge
After waxing lyrical to a friend the other day on the current state of Newcastle FC (it was more of a grind than a wax), they duly completed the story by getting whooped 3 – 0 by Arsenal. I never was any good at stories. Never mind, there are a number of factors that mitigate this disappointment. One being that they were beaten by a fabulous team; Arsenal play football the way you dreamt about it being played as a kid.

There is another game starting shortly (in about 15 minutes), Manchester United versus Tottenham Hotspur. Good people the world over will be saying a prayer (and it will probably take a prayer) in the hope that Tottenham can somehow overcome their opponents. Bad people the world over will be praying for another victory for the red menace so that darkness can descend upon the land.

But in the interests of fair play, and also because I'm a Liverpool FC fan and can't take any more disappointment, I shall remain neutral...

Tuesday, 8 January 2008

That was the year that was 2007

Atonement filmMoving house. Company taken over. Redundancies at work. Economise. Move out of house. Detached. Harry Potter. Move in with parents (temporary). Redundancies at work. Move into new house. Semi-detached. Bigger mortgage. Atonement. Economise. Wife quits work. Redundancies at work. Lose my car keys. Economise. Christmas.